Jodi Cross « Cross Network Marketing Inc.

Jul 21 2016

Have We Become Comfortably Numb?

As we all watch the news in horror I can’t help but wonder if we are growing numb to the evil in the world. It is easy to change the channel but with 49 dead and 53 wounded in Orlando in June and 84 dead and 202 wounded in Nice in July how can we continue to look away? It seems like every month there is another terrorist attack and they are getting closer and closer. According to Wikipedia, as of July 15, 2016 there have been 922 incidents of terrorism reported in the world. Many of the attacks don’t make the news in remote places such as the outskirts of Egypt, small towns in Syria or women being stoned to death in Iraq.

June was one of the most deadly months so far this year, with 218 incidents and over 1822 deaths including the attack at the Pulse Night Club in Orlando. So far July has seen over 84 incidents reported including both Dallas and Nice. It was shocking to see not even 24-hours after the Nice attack, Wikipedia chronicled two more incidents, tagging them to the bottom of their ongoing list. Wikipedia notes the type of attack, location, death toll, injury statistics, details and perpetrators. You can see the rankings and incidences by country. Not surprising Iraq ranks number one with over 2,714 incidences of terrorism in 2014, while the USA hoovers at 38 incidents for the same period. While that might sound like good news for us we still hold the number one spot for the worst terrorist attack in history on 911, when we lost 2996 souls. Unfortunately, our friends in France are ascending the dubious ranks from the middle of the list climbing rapidly up to the top tier. The disturbing facts go on to show everything from car bombings to mass shootings. According to the National Consortium for the Study of Terrorism 2014 showed a spike in deaths (43,550) and injuries (40,989).

*National Consortium for the Study of Terrorism and Responses to Terrorism.

On other sites, such as Islam Religion of Peace, there were shocking statistics with eerie benchmarks noting 28,822 attacks since 911. I shudder to think what their ultimate goal might be, mass annihilation or world dominance? After looking at the statistics you can’t deny the facts. Tensions are rising and we are at a tipping point. We need to wake up, stop changing the channel and figure out what we can all do to diminish the hatred in the world and strive for peace both in our country and in our own communities.

If these statistics aren’t alarming enough, we also appear to be imploding from within. Not only are our enemies out to get us we can’t even seem to get along as a nation. This is an important election year for our country. We need to elect a leader who will address these issues and come up with a plan to keep our country safe and united instead of divided.

Maybe you’re like me, numb to the evil in the world, all the rhetoric and politics. Many of my peers have said they may not even vote this year. The very thought has crossed my mind too. Then I think of the women who were stoned to death or the families suffering with loss after all this senseless violence and I remember how fortunate we are to have the right to vote and make a difference.

Let’s hope it won’t come down to a matter of self-preservation for our way of life, customs and beliefs. I would hate to see a day when we become afraid to travel or have to change the way we live our daily lives as a result of fear. We need all the strength we can muster to defend against the larger threat of terrorism looming at our very doorstep just waiting to claim its next victim. It’s time to take a stand, get out of our comfort zone and come up with real solutions for a broken world.

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, speaker and writer and can be reached at jcross@crossnm.com.

Jul 21 2016

Summer Camp Provides Life-Long Benefits

For decades kids have been shuffled off to camp each summer to experience bonding, make new friends and commune with nature. One of the coolest things about camp is being exposed to new experiences which help to develop your self-esteem. Growing up I only went to camp one time and the primary attraction was horseback riding. Little did I know at the time Circle C Ranch in Attica, New York would hold a special place in my life and become an experience I would never forget.

Going to camp has a way of connecting you to nature and drawing you into the physical realm of being present. This was an amazing experience and in today’s world of 24/7 connectivity, getting kids to put down technology and get physical is crucially important.

I was a lonely child growing up with a twelve year span between myself and my oldest sibling. Summer camp allowed me to meet new friends and provided a sense of community. Camp also sparked an interest in hobbies I wasn’t exposed to and taught me how to be more independent.

What attracted me to camp was the horseback riding program, which Circle C Ranch offered on a daily basis. I can honestly say I was hooked on riding after that summer. A lifelong passion ensued with private lessons, shows and competitions in English riding. As an adult, I still ride and enjoy the sport. Horses are such beautiful and soulful creatures and my love for them has never diminished.

As much as I love riding there was another gift I received from Circle C Ranch. Circle C was a mission based camp, something I didn’t realize when I enrolled. After my week was up the real gift appeared and has stayed with me my entire life. Our family grew up Catholic, we went to church every Sunday and attended Catechism on Thursday nights. All the church going taught me about religion and history but never about having a personal relationship with God. This cataclysmic shift opened up a whole new world for many of us campers. During our week at camp we learned there was not some super being looking down waiting to catch us doing something wrong. Rather a loving father looking to create a relationship and connection with all of mankind. There was something peaceful stirring in my spirit.

This amazing lesson weaved a way into my being. I won’t say the promises and commitments I made didn’t falter through my high school and college years but some piece stuck and a small flame was ignited. The biggest gift of all was the exposure to a new perspectives and a life-long journey of faith resulted.

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, speaker and writer and can be reached at jcross@crossnm.com.

Apr 19 2016

New York City Girl

Having grown up in New York State and spent my formative years as a New Yorker it occurred to me, I had never actually considered myself to be a tourist in Manhattan. New York City has over 50 million foreign and American tourists a year. Recently, I joined the ranks and visited Ellis Island, took in a show off Broadway, garnered a bird’s eye view from the World Trade Center and had a moment of silence at the 911 memorial.

When I moved to Florida one of my first jobs brought me to New York City as a sales manager. Throughout the years I would go to the city for meetings and events but I honestly had never done the attractions. I always hit Fifth Avenue for a little wardrobe refresh, if you consider that an attraction.

This year we went to New York City for spring break. Some of the highlights included; visiting Ellis Island, the Statue of Liberty and the 911 memorial. We also dined at the newly renovated Tavern on the Green and ate Dim Sum in Chinatown.

We met up with my step daughter and the three grand kids who had never been to New York. Seeing the sites of the City through their eyes was interesting. I found myself wondering if they thought all New Yorkers’ were used to seeing a naked cowboy singing in the street, a dancing grown up baby and a number of furry characters roaming Time Square at all hours of the night.

Places to Go & Things to Do

New York City has a plethora of great attractions, museums and things to do. For us, we had a mixed crowd of young kids and adults so we needed to strike a balance. When choosing your hit list, pick things that cater to the majority of the crowd. The kids were interested in the Natural History Museum, some gaming attractions, Times Square and some of the more traditional landmarks such as Ellis Island and the 911 Memorial.

We started our first day with a trip to Ellis Island. Our ancestry traces back to Ireland and Germany and it was interesting to see the names and photos of boats that carried our forefathers to this country. Once we arrived we spent time in the great hall and looked at all the amazing images and faces of the immigrants who came to the United States so long ago. The thought of traversing continents and oceans in hopes of a better life or in some cases to escape dire circumstances is a central theme of our great and welcoming country. There are samples lining the entrance walls of exams immigrants had to pass, photos of new comers suspected of being sick showing bright white chalk marks on their lapels and desperate faces of women and children carrying all their worldly possessions.

The Ellis Island Ferry takes you to the Statue of Liberty. Be sure to reserve early or you won’t be able to go to the top. We went to the base and the views were inspirational looking up at Liberatas and seeing the broken chains at her feet. This flamboyant gift from France is a symbol of our liberty and the ties that bind all those who enter. After 911, the Statue of Liberty once again became a renewed symbol of hope and her true identity and meaning were a poignant reminder to us all, “Liberty Enlightening the World”.

After leaving Ellis Island we headed to the 911 memorial. This is a must see! There is no other event in my life and the life of many in my generation like 911. Staring into the reflection pools representing the two towers is truly a cathartic experience. Many memories come flooding back as I thought of where I was on that horrific day. Off in the distance one tree survived the attacks and was in full bloom on the day we visited. This symbol of life blossoming anew is truly touching.

Shopping-Eating-Drinking

When in New York City, bring your wallet! There are plenty of choices including some wonderful and reasonable Deli’s. We choose Tavern on the Green for a special dinner, the Moonstruck Diner for a more casual lunch and Chinatown for some amazing Dim Sum at the Nom Wah Tea Parlor. Other mentionable include The Oyster Bar and Cipriani’s near Grand Central Station.

The Tavern was fabulous! As we arrived and entered the bar area a swanky 40’s style band was playing. The lead singer was in character complete with a vintage dress and oversized microphone belting out classics such as Fly Me to the Moon and Mack the Knife. The dinner was amazing from both a taste and a service perspective. The ambiance was polished and harkened back to a flamboyant Mad Men era. We had a variety of dishes but the Coq Au Vin and the Rack of Lamb would be considered no less than divine. Don’t miss the Truffle Caesar Salad. You’ll want to beg for the recipe. Fun cocktails such as the Queens, Bronx and the Manhattan have you sipping and savoring every minute. There is even a kids menu with mini yummy cuisine for the smallest pallet.

Moonstruck has a great late night dessert menu and offers a quick breakfast option for all to enjoy. There are multiple locations and we never had a problem being seated even with a party of eight.

If your feeling adventurous, head to Chinatown and try some Dim Sum. Be fair warned, you will be approached to buy every kind of souvenir and fake watch known to mankind. Be careful not to go into the back alleys. Our final destination was the Nom Wah Tea Parlor. This iconic restaurant has been family owned since 1920. Everything was delicious and plentiful. The sampler platter, original egg rolls and spare ribs top the list of delectable. The wait was over 30 minutes so be prepared to stand on the corner for a bit but the wait was worth it once inside.

Expert Insight

I am usually a big planner but this trip was much more flexible. There are some great apps that help you plan at the last minute and still get good deals. Instead of waiting in line in the rain for tickets to a show, try Today Tix. This app lets you peruse shows of interest, order tickets and has a red shirt representative meet you outside the theater at show time. We saw a great show called “Fully Committed” with Jessie Tyler Ferguson from “Modern Family.” He plays nearly 40 characters complete with voice accents and attitudes. The premise entails a struggling actor who works taking reservations at a fancy restaurant in New York. The show is hysterical and plays at the Lyceum Theater.

My Uber app crashed during our visit but my husband was able to load his up. This is a great benefit as they now have an Uber XL which can accommodate bigger parties for a ride. Of course the subway offers an easy, less time consuming and efficient way to get around the city.

We did encounter a bit of a snag at the hotel. Apparently, when you are between seasons some older hotels do not convert from a heating system to an air conditioning system. This caused a stifling few nights and very little sleep. To avoid the whole hot mess, ask some questions before booking with a follow up question about having in-room fans or windows that actually open.

I hope you’ll come along for my next road trip!

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, travel blogger and speaker and may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or www.www.crossnm.com

Mar 16 2016

Are You For Real?

Do you ever feel like you are living someone else’s life? Turns out this phenomenon has a name and is prevalent in 70% of high-functioning women in today’s society. Men, I don’t mean to exclude you as there are indications that you too suffer from impostor syndrome.

What is Impostor syndrome, also known as fraud syndrome?

According to Wikipedia, in 1978 two clinical psychologists named Dr. Pauline R. Clance and Suzanne A. Imes coined the phrase while referring to high-achieving individuals marked by an inability to accept their accomplishments as true and had a persistent fear of being exposed as a “fraud.”

Despite evidence of their competence, those exhibiting the syndrome remain convinced that they are frauds and do not deserve the success they have achieved. They see proof of success but dismiss it as luck or timing. They attribute success as a result of deceiving others into thinking they are more intelligent and competent than they believe themselves to be. People with impostor syndrome tend to be perfectionists, which means they’re likely to spend hours working overtime to make sure they excel in every single field.

Fraud syndrome is also an equal opportunity employer. From Broadway stars to Silicone Valley boardrooms to the Supreme Court, no one is immune. Stars like Michelle Pfeifer, business tycoon Sherly Sandberg and even Supreme Court Judge Sonia Sotomayer are all afraid that one of these days they will be found out.

I recall some simple advice given to me way back in the day when I started my career. “Fake it ‘til you make it.” Could that have been the start of my journey as a phony? Once you start to buy into the self-doubt, the cycle becomes a slippery slope of inauthenticity creating a drive to be perfect followed by a fear of being exposed. Then one day you wake up and realize nobody’s perfect!

Here are my top five tips on how to stop fraud syndrome in its tracks.

Embrace and accept yourself.

Claim your success and own it. I have a dear friend who built a successful business and sold it for millions of dollars. The selling part didn’t go off a smoothly as it could have, but nonetheless she built the company from nothing and made a major impact on people’s lives along the way. One day I brought this up to her and she just shrugged. I looked at her and said, “You don’t think you are successful business women do you?” She said, “No, I just lucked into it.” You have to be able to accept the success you have and embrace the fact that you deserve some of the opportunities provided to you.

Being perfect is impossible.

Admit you’re not perfect. No one is and there is no shame in admitting it. Sometimes we win in life and sometimes we lose. Being wrong on an issue or losing a job doesn’t make you a phony it makes you human.

Don’t take shortcuts because they only derail your long-term confidence.

One of the roots of my fraud stem from grade school. I have a math phobia. My teacher was a yeller. Every time I asked a question or didn’t understand something he would yell at us. Thus, I stopped asking. As a result I never properly learned my multiplication tables. I would carry a laminated times table grid around in my pocket in case I was picked on to answer a question. If I didn’t have the grid I would be overcome at the thought of being exposed. Instead of using this little short cut, the laminated grid, I should have addressed the issue with tutors and extra help. This issue festered well into my college years.

Be authentic!

I am a little quirky! There I said it. Some people will like me and some people won’t, that’s life! If you walk around being the shell of the person you could be your cheating yourself and the world out of the true you!

Shift from self-focused to others focused.

When you remove the self-focus and begin to serve others, you will find you can’t continue to wallow in impostor syndrome. By serving or helping others, you are moving into action and it becomes virtually impossible to keep up the novella of comparisons, worries about measuring up and fears of unequal social status. Stop comparing yourself to others, your uniquely-made quirks and all.

As it turns out, you’re not an impostor after all. You are a brave risk taker who may fail on occasion but you always get back up and can fake it ‘til you make it one more time, and make you will!

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, speaker and writer and can be reached at jcross@crossnm.com.

[1] Wikipedia, the Definition of Imposter Syndrome, 1978. “The imposter phenomenon in high achieving women: dynamics and therapeutic intervention.”. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research and Practice by Clance, P.R, Imes, S.A.

Feb 17 2016

Hashtag Roundup

Hashtag Roundup

Hashtags have become a common practice these days; people use them for all sorts of purposes. You find them in text messages, chats, songs and advertisements. But where did it all begin? Turns out a former Google developer and California techie named Chris Messina posted a message in 2007 to solicit advise on using the hashtag symbol, then known as the pound sign, as an idea for groups on social media. He was met with mixed reviews at the time but the trend took off. So much so that in June of 2014, the Oxford English Dictionary added the hashtag to their definitions.

What are hashtags used for?

Hashtags are the card catalogue of social media. The metadata tag system connects your content with other people talking about the same things or looking for information about something. So, if you write an article about using Twitter for Business and use the #TwitterTips hashtag, more people will find your content.

Hashtag Tracking

When you’re thinking of hashtags, it’s beneficial to look at your audience and your competitors. Find the keywords and hashtags that are already associated with your brand and boost them. There are many tools to help you find keywords. A simple trick I have learned is to use the search feature in both Twitter and Instagram. Instagram actually provides a number count for how many people are looking for the specific keywords when you plug them in.

Hashtag usage and effectiveness varies by platform. They will enhance your engagement if used properly. Engagement includes clicks, retweets, favorites, and replies.

Let’s take a quick look at each platform and the use of hashtags.

Facebook

On Facebook hashtags are not as well received as on other platforms. Research has shown they actually lower engagement. So a good rule of thumb is less is more. 1-2 hashtags are best for Facebook. You don’t want to be perceived as a hashtag spammer. You can use the search tool on Facebook in the graph section to see what is trending.

Twitter & Instagram

On these platforms hashtags are readily received and can increase your reach significantly. Tweets with hashtags get two times more engagement than tweets without. Some brands have seen a 50 percent increase with the use of hashtags according to HubSpot, a leading digital trend agency.

Instagram is ground zero for hashtag use. The platform has noted up to 30 hashtags used but 10 or 11 seem to get the highest interaction.

Google+

This platform has gone the way of the less used social media portals but is still worth mentioning. Google+ is Google’s social network; hashtags were built right into Google searches. If you type in a hashtag search, you’ll get the normal search results plus a sidebar of relevant Google+ posts.

Pinterest

Brands use Pinterest to showcase products in a visual sense. For tagging you can only place tags in the description section. The tag use helps searcher to find categories of interest.

Rule of thumb: 1 – 3 tags are best over all platforms.

Twitter: to categorize
Pinterest: to brand, build like communities and be specific (tags are only clickable in pin descriptions)
Instagram: to build community, and be unique/detailed. Up to 30 hashtags can be used. For best results stick with 10+
Google+: to categorize; auto generates tags based on what it thinks your post is most relevant to
Facebook: sort of a hashtag free zone – if your audience is very business-minded, follow Twitter rules; if it is community-oriented, follow Pinterest/Instagram rules

Check out these resources

Hashtagify.me

Hashtagify.me provides a cross referencing tool for data you can use to analyze hashtags. When you type in a hashtag, you see other hashtags and a display of how popular each hashtag. This also provides a glimpse into what key influencers are using.

RiteTag

This site provides a visual organization of hashtags into colored bars showing quick analysis at-a-glance. This allows you to see what is overused or saturated and what words would be good to boost your posts.

Tagboard

The results pages on Tagboard show hash tagged posts from Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Google+, and Pinterest.

Twitalyzer

Twitalyzer helps you audit competitors and can tell you what hashtags they use most frequently. This can be really helpful in finding out how your niche’s influencers tweet.

Tweepi.com

If you are looking for more twitter followers try this tool. Plug in your interests and industry key words and Tweepi can help identify followers and groups to grow your lists.

Summary Tips

Plug in relevant keywords to your business and the audience you are trying to target. (If you are a local business, use the name of your Geo Address too).
Keep it simple on most platforms, less is more when it comes to hashtags.
Put your #hashtag in the end of the #sentence. That makes #reading the sentence #lessannoying.
If your brand piggybacks on popular hashtags, you could increase your visibility and reach. They are great for tracking events and see what others are posting.
Try some of the tools noted and see which the best is for you. Some offer free services and others provide price based packages.

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, writer, blogger and brand builder. For more information visit www.www.crossnm.com or jcross@crossm.com .

Source Information on trends referenced from Hubspot.

Feb 10 2016

February 20th –National Love Your Pet Day

National Love Your Pet Day

During the month of February people usually write about love, relationships and matters of the heart. February commemorates a different kind of holiday which still shares the spirit of love. Four legged, furry love that is.

One of my first loves as a child was my Siamese cat Meiling. I shared my entire childhood with Meiling. In fact she lived to be 20 years old, sadly, she passed when I went off to college. We all loved her, she was a little four legged bossy cat who ruled the house. She was so cherished that we commissioned a portrait of her which still hangs on our wall some 30-years later. Meiling was very mouthy. My older brothers were always up to no good and inevitably just as they were trying to sneak out she would start to meow at the top of her lungs. Meiling foiled many escape plans during their teenage years.

Pets were a big part of my life growing up. When I was a kid we always had several dogs and cats scampering about our house. Usually three or four cats and three or more beagles punctuated my childhood with memories of puppies, passing’s and special friendships.

I remember returning from a family vacation to Hawaii and one of our dogs had a litter of puppies. My dad allowed me to name one puppy Bubbles after Don Ho’s song “Tiny Bubbles”. All of his buddies would make fun of him whenever he had to chase down my dog yelling at the top of his lungs, “Bubbles, Bubbles”. After Bubbles, Dad named the dog’s rather boring and macho names such as Prince and Huey to save face.

As the youngest child, I had a special relationship with Meiling. She was a friend when I was a little pesky younger sister and gave me comfort when I was scared or lonely. Cats also can be a great judge of character. Meiling didn’t like one of my girlfriends growing up, later I found out she has stolen several items from me.

As we celebrate, National Love Your Pet Day, think of all the wonderful things your pet does for you on a daily basis. The unconditional love and the cute photo opportunities you can post on Facebook. One of my friends rescued a cat and now he has his own page and following just like Grumpy Cat. If your family doesn’t have a pet, perhaps you might want to consider adopting one at a local shelter. 7.6 million animals are sheltered every year and unfortunately approximately 2.7 million are euthanized. We share our home with two four legged family members. They cheer you up when you have a bad day and are always available to snuggle. Pets are a great source of companionship, they relieve stress and some statistics say they even help you live longer. You have the power to save a life and gain a best friend too.

Jodi Cross is a marketing consultant, speaker and writer and can be reached at jcross@crossnm.com.

Jan 27 2016

The Dark Side of Social Media

The Dark Side of Social Media

Has social media become ground zero for hatred causing a viciousness epidemic? Recently I witnessed such depravity; I had to take a step back and wonder if there ought to be Geneva Convention Rules for social media.

Eighty one percent of young adults think online bullying is easier to get away with than bullying in person. Forty three percent said they have been bullied before. I wonder where have our young people learned this snarky behavior? Perhaps the source goes back to their parents.

Many of you may have followed the controversial development project in the works in Jupiter. People seemed to have a great deal to say about the project from both sides. If you ask me the online ranting, taunting and, in some cases, defaming people because they had a difference of opinion, went too far. As I followed along to see what both sides had to say, I noticed a spirit of shaming that can only be characterized as a mob-rule mentality. As soon as a post was made the same four or five people would try to shut the post down with personal attacks, antagonistic rants and badgering comments.

I was curious to see what was behind all this hatred and bitterness. I get the fact that people are very passionate about their beliefs and, when pushed, Americans have always been able to mobilize into action. When I went to see what all the fuss was, I found friendly smiling faces some with lovely portraits of children by their side with interests such as church, saving the animals and other assorted noble causes. There were several rapid fire rounds of emotional exchanges sent out across the social media sphere in a mob-like wave. I returned to some of the repeat offenders profile pages and found they had removed most of their personal information.

How brazen the exchanges became from these bullies cloaked in anonymity living out their lives in The Matrix of social media. One person seemed to attack every post within minutes and even went on to attack any person who disagreed with her position. In one exchange, the post writer tried to comment back and was met with this response, “This is America, I can shame and bully if I want to.” Really!

Not only do we seem to have an epidemic of hatred and bitterness on-line but we are clearly having a famine of kindness and love. The whole exchange was just ugly and left me wondering if social media has amplified the bully on the playground to the point where anonymous personal attacks have become the new weapons of mass destruction. I can only hope this is just a small sliver of reality and not what my America has really turned into. Have a Happy New Year and may we all spread a little more kindness!

Jodi Cross is a marketing consultant, speaker and freelance writer and may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or www.www.crossnm.com .

Jan 15 2016

Avoid Confrontation by Diffusing Arguments Before They Begin

Want to avoid confrontation and create better customer feedback and work relations? Here is some good advice, don’t engage in an argument in the first place. Instead, diffuse the situation before it escalates by agreeing with your adversary’s point of view.

Recently, while dining at a local seafood restaurant a customer came up to the owner to complain about an employee. We happened to be sitting at the bar when the argument ensued. The owner got defensive after a women told him there had been a credit card mix up and suggested he needed to fire his employee and waived her angry finger toward a clerk at the cash register. The owners took the position that his employee had been with him a long time and was probably just having a bad night. This of course could be construed as a logical response, however, to the customer it appeared as if the owner didn’t care. This resulted in a series of threats including posting disparaging comments on Yelp and so forth. After the women left I couldn’t help but comment to the owner.

Clearly she was upset and nothing was going to change her position. What could he have done differently? Change his response to something like, “I understand, thank you for letting me know. I appreciate your comments and I will speak with John. We take this matter very seriously.” Why this approach would work better: You diffused the situation by validating the other person’s concerns. At that point, the customer would have felt heard and had a positive experience instead of remembering both the employee credit card mix up and the owners’ perceived lack of concern.

Another thing you can do is offer a resolution that satisfies everyone’s needs. Example: “We both have had a busy night, may we offer you a free dessert on the house? If you can’t wait, I understand, catch me next time and we will make sure you are taken care of properly.” Most likely, he would have gained a customer for life by turning the situation around using this small recovery strategy. At the worst, he would have opened up a dialogue resulting in a compromise and possibly avoided a negative review on social media.

Diffusing an argument before it starts is a powerful recovery tool that can be used in a multitude of situations in your personal and professional life. Remember to diffuse an argument you must listen, agree, sympathize, offer a resolution and nine times out of ten everyone will walk away satisfied.

Jodi Cross is a marketing strategist, speaker and writer and can be reached at jcross@crossnm.com.

Nov 17 2015

The Power of Owning Your Choices

The Power of Owning Your Choices

As we cruise into holiday mode, there will be a plethora of choices to make including which gifts to buy, what parties to attend and which family members to visit. For some, the holidays are a joyous time but for others stress can overwhelm you and ruin the season. There may be underlying family struggles or hurt feelings lingering from your past. There is good news; you hold the power to move forward within you by owning your choices.

I recently watched a segment about a reunion at Alcatraz. Former prisoners and guards from the notorious prison came back for a visit and to share a meal. Admittedly, it was an odd segment but one of the prisoners said something very cathartic which caught my attention. He was talking about his story and how he ended up in Alcatraz. He robbed a bank and was locked up as a result of his crime. During his time in prison, he came to realize that he had chosen Alcatraz. He explained he had made a choice to rob a bank and the choice led him to being captured and then serving time to pay his debt to society, so in essence his own choice put him in Alcatraz. After his release, he never committed another crime again. He had an awakening and owned up to his choices. The power of owning up to what he did released him. Conversely, another one of the inmates interviewed was now in his 80’s and had only turned his life around five years ago. He turned away from his decades of crime and a life of wrecked personal relationships to start again.

Our choices have short-term and long-term effects in our life. There are methods to head off negative choices which start by weighing your decisions carefully. Here are three simple steps to consider;

First, intentionally prepare for a decision and avoid impulse decisions. Think about the benefits, downsides and if the choice fits in with your goals and direction. I use this to stop myself from shopping or eating something I don’t need. Would I rather have one more blouse or money in my 40lK for retirement?
Second, evaluate the possible outcomes. For evaluating I use the Suzy Welch method described in her book 10.10.10. Consider the ramifications or benefits of your decision today, tomorrow or down the road. In Suzy’s terms, how will your choice affect you in the next 10 minutes, 10 months or 10 years? When I think of this in terms of the prisoner example, he was probably living in the 10 minute, 10 month zone but not truly considering how his choices would haunt him for years if he were caught.
Finally, follow through and own your choices, don’t rationalize. Sometimes moving forward on some of life’s harder decisions can be difficult. Things such as whether to accept a new job, move across country or start a new venture can create monumental changes in life. Personally, I find emotional decisions to be the most draining. Should you keep a friendship after someone has betrayed you? Are your kids on solid ground?

To help with the decision process you can use a few tools to guide you.

Collaboration and asking feedback are a good way to get a 360° perspective.
Considering your past experiences and personal knowledge then applying wisdom to create a solid barometer.
Listening to your intuition or what I call your internal voice, this can provide invaluable guidance in decision making.

Is there a choice or something you need to let go of this holiday season? Maybe you’re facing a dysfunctional family situation or you need to forgive someone. Look at your choices with discernment, clarity and from the perspective of will this matter today, tomorrow or next month. Then, move on with confidence. Owning your choices and decisions can be very liberating. Happy Holidays!

Jodi Cross is a marketing consultant, speaker and freelance writer and may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or www.www.crossnm.com .

Oct 20 2015

Day Tripping, Yeah!

Staycations emerged as a trend a while back and flourished even more when the economy took a dip. When I opened a hotel in Sunny Isles Beach FL some years ago, I was amazed at how many people would come from Weston for a long weekend. Recently, my husband and I decided to do a day trip and overnight at the Eau Palm Beach. Until this brief but wonderful experience I hadn’t truly understood the power of the staying close to home.

Although The Eau Palm Beach is just a short drive from our Jupiter home, it felt like a world away. This little gem is nestled on the south end of Palm Beach which is technically called Manalapan and recently ranked first place in the Conde Nast Readers’ Choice Awards for resorts in Florida, Atlantic and the Keys. Upon arrival we were greeted by the friendly valet, escorted into the lobby and met with a smiling associate offering champagne. In my opinion, The Eau strikes the perfect balance between authentic service versus intrusive service. We have all been out someplace where you can see people are trying just a little too hard. You take a sip of your ice tea and the server is back with a new glass. Causing you to recalibrate your drink with the appropriate balance of sweetener and lemon when the first glass was perfectly mixed.

As we were escorted to our room we received a briefing from a very informed bellmen. We settled in our room and went to check out the hotel. Luckily for us we were on the club level. We were delighted with the accommodating staff. Phillip who managed the lounge, was a perfect stranger upon check in but felt more like family by the time we left. The lounge offers lunch, snacks, light breakfast food, afternoon & evening wine and cocktails. On the way out you can even grab some retro-candy from a glass sphere filled with Lemon Heads and Hot Balls.

As the afternoon was lingering on we hit the pool for a refreshing dip. Just as we scouted out a couple of chairs in the shade, a pool attendant arrived offered towels and drink options. Again, the perfect balance of just in time service without being overwhelming. Heck yeah, we will take some towels and a frozen drink!

After a dip, we took a walk along the beach. In Manalapan, the beach tends to come and go with seasonal erosion. Walking south you barely see anyone along a stretch of private beach dotted with shells and an occasional jelly fish haphazardly washed up on shore. We cut our walk short so as to enjoy the Eau Spa experience.

The Eau Spa is as unique as the hotel and recently won Forbes Five Star spa rating. Once inside this little sanctuary you quickly see why. From the hanging swings in the common area to the wishing fountain the experiences is divinely decadent and pampering. There are cupcakes, rubber ducky mascots, flowing champagne and steam showers. We booked a couples massage and were treated to a stress busting rub complete with personalized aromatherapy scents, music to our liking and comfortable massage beds which inclined slightly upward upon our back flip providing immediate relief for our nasal passages.

Somehow all this activity had tuckered us out. Maybe it was the long drive, the stress of packing and travelling or the hustle and bustle of getting there. Oh wait, another benefit of the staycation: there is no hustle and bustle! We retired for a nap and then headed to dinner.

The Island of Palm Beach has many choices for shopping, eating and drinking. During our stay we dined at the hotel restaurant Angle for dinner. The food was great and one of their evening specials was a stuffed squash blossom. Yummy. The vibe was friendly and fine all rolled into one. We chatted it up a bit with the folks at the table next to us only to learn they were locals too. They come to Angle on a frequent basis and the waiter knew them by name. There goes the reputation of hotel restaurants and the myth of being overly priced with dull food. Angle exceeded my expectation on many levels.

The next morning we were going to stay for brunch but all this delicious food made us want to get moving. We enjoyed a lavish breakfast display in Temple Orange and hit the road refreshed and raving about the whole staycation experience.

I did enjoy a run through some of the most high-end consignment shops in the country. Be sure to try the Church Mouse and Goodwill on the Island. The stores are loaded with designer clothes, some even have the original tags on them and have never been worn. I picked up a pair of Burberry Sandals for twenty dollars. Score!

Jodi Cross is a marketing consultant, speaker and freelance writer and may be reached at jcross@crossnm.com or http://www.crossnm.dev.php56-30.ord1-1.websitetestlink.com

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